Jericho bearish on sidewalk traffic, dovish on road traffic

Bear release in Jericho, VT fails to slow traffic. 

- Laugh, Dream, Try, and do good 

Bernie

The once quiet and sleepy little town of Jericho now has insomnia due to the constant very fast-moving traffic.  Browns Trace, in particular, has become so much like Daytona Speedway that that town is considering switching the naming convention between Raceway Road and Browns Trace - an even swap - Browns Trace will gain a dirt road, and the name 'Raceway' while Raceway Road will gain asphalt and give up all its potholes. 

One recent measure had promised at least a temporary measure of success until the shock value wore off. However, even the initial release of a large bear 

along the sidewalk during the mid-morning traffic commute barely had an impact. Most of the commuters did not look away from their phones and kept on trucking like they were Buford T Justice in pursuit of *Smokey and the Bandit. If a bear walking down the sidewalk does not make drivers more alert and aware of their surroundings and slow down, what will?

The bear's release onto the sidewalk stirred up a lot of folks at home. Emails and phone calls, camera clicks, drooping jaws; why some folks ran out to hug their compost buckets for fear the bear would set them spinning as it strolled by. 

Meanwhile, the whirlwind of speeding traffic caused no such storm other than to send a child's ball flying through a house window, flatten twenty-two chipmunks, and six raccoons, as well as de-feathering eleven birds. 

The bear simply grimaced and said it was not its place to draw attention to walkers and bicyclists. The bear just wanted to make a statement that Jericho's sidewalks benefit ALL residents - only don't try to cross the street. 

Some have suggested that on-street parking narrows the street and slows traffic by creating friction for moving vehicles. Perhaps we can get one of the Ethan Allen Firing Range Convoys to park along Browns Trace while they wait for breakfast from the Jericho Country Store. Maybe even eat their breakfast and lunch before they move along. Perhaps that would help keep Jericho safe and secure for a little while. 

A few years back there was an electronic sign that indicated to drivers the speed they were traveling - apparently, car speedometers now run on molasses. Alas, the speed of the cars traveling by was too much for the digital computerized mechanical nanny - it went up in smoke - it was not designed to register numbers over 50 MPH. 

Jericho applied for a grant for a new electronic nanny, but the grant was rejected. Once you wave the green flag at the Indy 500, it's nearly impossible to bring out the yellow flag. A crossing guard is being considered, however, the life expectancy of a crossing guard may not be any longer than that of the mechanical speed sign.

Trees narrow a driver's visual field and create rhythm along the street. We are soon to have a whole lot of uprooted Ash trees needing a place to go. Does anybody have a really big post-hole digger whereby we can transplant some of them along the road? If they fall down over the road - all the better to slow traffic. At a minimum, can we at least get some trees 'painted' on the road? See examples at https://www.hotcars.com/20-weirdest-things-people-painted-on-roads-to-slow-down-speeding-cars/

Moving the fog lines in to make lanes appear narrower to slow traffic down is an option. I have lots of large thick chalk! Comes in lots of pretty colors too.

Not surprisingly cat owners want to be sure their voice is heard. A petition for a catwalk or cat bridge is floating around town. 

One final hope is that with an increase in homes built in Jericho over the next few years, the traffic will become so congested as to, by definition, slow it down to somewhere near the traffic limit. "A bear-able traffic delay."

Anticipatory plans are in place for a toll booth on Barber Farm Road. The maple syrup bucket on the telephone pole having been recently installed is ready to collect the passageway coins. 

I for one hope the potholes from Raceway come to Browns Trace in full form and function.

Unfortunately, we cannot safely feed the bears our compost, otherwise, I would be spreading our food scraps onto the road. 

This all brings us to the ***fundamentals: Why do we rush through life? I can barely hold myself back from trying to answer that one, but that is for another essay when I am not in such a hurry to get wherever it is I am going - and at my age that ain't very far away. I hope the **Pearly Gates are easier to cross than Browns Trace. 

* Smokey and the Bandit movie: Get ready to tear up the highway with the Bandit (Burt Reynolds), a fun-loving, fast-talking trucker who takes on his craziest haul yet - delivering 400 cases of beer from Texarkana to Atlanta in just 28 hours. With Sheriff Buford T. Justice (Jackie Gleason) hot on his trail and eager to teach him some respect for the law, the Bandit joins forces with good ol' boy, Cledus (Jerry Reed) and runaway bride Carrie (Sally Field). 

** I'm an optimist.

*** Another fundamental question is capacity. What is the capacity of Jericho (people, homes, cars, noise...). And will we leave room for wildlife?

****Like Black Bears satire can have great (paw) dexterity (with their front feet), allowing (them) it to be firm and gentle. 

Jericho Road Vehicle Management Plan: Link cannot be opened - must be a pending action!

Consider petitioning for safer and slower streets. Read our signs and behave accordingly for all our well-being, bears included.

This squirrel learned quickly that it was not safe to cross the street (at least not on the road). 

For further reading and viewing

Traffic Stops For Family of Bears (Facebook video)

Bear Picks Up Fallen Traffic Cone by Roadside Before Walking Away  (You tube clip)

Optical illusions slow drivers

Roadway Striping as a Traffic Calming Option

Why We Rush Through Life (Huffington Post)

The Bare Necessities (from The Jungle Book)

The Art of Taking It Easy: How to Cope with Bears, Traffic, and the Rest of Life's Stressors