Hi, my name is Bernie and I am a native plant addict. Every year I buy more plants. I buy bare-root plants from WVPD yearly plant sale and the Intervale Conservation Nursery in BTV. I buy plants online, wildflower seeds for example, from Prairie Moon Nursery. Always on the lookout for affordable native plants. I even created a list of all of the plants native to Vermont, 1,458 of them. And if I could get my hands on every one of them, I WOULD.

However, my reasoned self, Maeve, and my psychoanalyst all tell me when it comes to my obsession, yes that was the term used, when it comes to my plant obsession, I must slow down.

I have reduced our lawn size considerably to have more room to grow plants native to Vermont. Pretty soon we are going to have to look into purchasing some of our neighbor's vacant land as we are running out of room for me to put more plants in the ground on our 1.3-acre yard.

Our goal is to create a bird and pollinator sanctuary with at least 70% of all our plants native to Vermont.

When I am not planting, I may be building more critter houses; woodpiles, stone piles, stone piles with underground tunnels, and custom-built skylight (hey the little critters deserve an open airy, and sunny home too). Or I might be placing a bumble bee box with a vacancy sign on it in a secluded area of our yard.

I have hung up countless bird boxes including one for owls and one for pileated woodpeckers (both unoccupied so far), two bat boxes, bee boxes for Mason bees and other cavity-nesting bees, birdbaths, frog pools, bee watering stations, butterfly food, and water stations, and even a multi-story apartment house for critters of all sorts.

This winter, while my nongreen thumb rested, I researched wild solitary bees, bumblebees, butterflies and moths, and other pollinators and compiled the best photos out of the 3,941 insects I observed and photographed in 2021 in our backyard. Then I put together over ten one-hour Zoom presentations to show those photos and share some interesting facts about the insects I observed in our yard. The one titled Eat or be Eaten is gory but cool, I think. The one about Insect Sex is, well let's just say that insect sex is a lot more shocking than Fifty Shades of Grey. Another one is about beneficial insects and garden pests. Also, I created one titled “Native Plants for Pollinators and for You”.

So it is not like planting is the only thing I do in nature. But, with 1,458 plants native to Vermont, and my having only planted a bit over 200 (ok way over 200) species in our yard, I ask you how can that be an obsession?

Over the last two years, I have hauled enough cardboard to our backyard (in preparation for wildflower planting) to wallpaper an entire city. Finally, last fall I planted 27 species of Wildflowers native to Vermont. Fingers crossed that at least some will come up this year. Perennial wildflower seeds are notoriously slow in germinating, some take years. Thankfully I have (some) patience and still have a wee bit of yard left to plant in.

So I ordered even more wildflower seeds this spring. I also purchased two Evans Bali Cherry trees, a Wolf River apple tree, a Johns Elderberry, three Autumn Brilliance Juneberry, one Smoky Juneberry, and a Northern Juneberry. They all came in from St. Lawerence Nurseries a few days ago. All bare-root so they had to be planted within a couple of days. All this after saying last year, I have got to stop buying more plants before someone mistakes our backyard for the Amazon (the forest not the world resource extractor).

Note to self, purchasing plants is so much easier than planting them: figuring out where to plant them (Yup I did this in advance last year, but my stakes indicating planting spots seem to be missing, along with my notes) digging in the mud, pulling out humongous rocks the size of Utah, making three piles of dirt from the hole then placing the plant in place and refilling the hole from the three piles in reverse order with top-level sod going in first to feed the plant over time, then cutting hardware cloth (small opening fencing) to disfavor rabbits, then tall fencing to discourage deer, then cardboard and mulch, then a gazillion trips with five gallon-watering buckets.

Later this spring (April 30) I will pick up my latest WVPD Tree Sale order of two Gray Dogwood, two Northern Spicebush, and two Witch Hazel. Yes, we already have some of those, but ours looked lonely. All bare-root; I better mark that day on the calendar as full.

Now, where in the world will I plant them? Maeve is already feeling claustrophobic in the backyard. Perhaps she would let me take the clothesline down, that would be enough space for one, maybe two plants…hmmm.

The ground is barely thawed, yet when I walk about in the backyard today, in late March, I can almost hear the awakenings underground. The roots stretching like I do in the morning, the microbes having their first breakfast in perhaps months; I see buds struggling to protrude from the cambium, I see crocuses leading the charge, snowdrops finding it easier than ever to bloom without snow or ice. And I am already looking forward to the early flowering bloomers, the lilacs, cherry bushes and cherry trees, redbuds, honeyberries, flowering quince, serviceberry (or Juneberry), and others that will feed the newly emerging queen bumble bees, the early emerging mason bees, and many other insects coming out of their winter dens for their first look at the new year above ground.

Finally, the last plant is in the ground. Well, the last one for today anyway. I am a bit lame around my knees, my back aches a bit, my arms are like spaghetti, just about all of me is covered in mud, my stomach is growling, I have a gazillion tools, fencing, stakes, buckets, shovels, sledgehammer, wire cutters, gloves, and more yet to be put away. I am wasted and have not even prepared the ground for the wildflower seeds that came in the mail today. In the future, I must learn to pace myself. Too old, not enough space in the yard, (still working on persuading Maeve to let me plant under the clothesline), not enough hours in the day. Time to move on to another interest.

After a shower, a real quick food gulp, I head to my computer. And guess what captures my attention as quickly as tinker-bell on caffeine!

My wish list of native plants for specialist bees (bees that feed on only one or only a few species of plants). Of course, I must have some of those and it is so easy to order them. Now, what was that I wanted to remind myself the next time I thought about ordering more plants. Oh ya, I remember, you can’t ever have too many native plants!

Frederick Law Olmstead, the famed American public park designer, in 1883, tasked Charles Sargent to select and place 100,000 native plants within a space that was a mere 2.5 acres. He's my hero!

PS, if you need a plant fix, check out the Community Center in Jericho benefit Plant Sale.

Hooked on and amazingly grateful for nature,

Bernie

I am the guy trying to turn dirt into soil, mono-culture desert lawn into life feeding home-building habitat of *native plants.

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Responses:

Hi Bernie, a belated April Fool's day to you. You might consider that the first step one must take when suffering from NPE (native plant excess) is to accept it. You appear to be on the right path, although you do recognize that NPED (native plant excess denial) is an impediment to your recovery. Clearly, accepting that your NPED blocks your ability to properly face NPE is key. Perhaps if you could put certain plants out of your mind, you might find peace. Do you fret over the demise of the elm, chestnut, ash (currently underway), etc.? Do you need to be restrained from attacking every Euro import dandelion on every lawn? Do you avoid eating wheat products and urge others to eat maize as a preferable native plant?

My office is accepting new patients. Should you wish to schedule a session, please feel free to drop us an email.

D. B. A. DLt.

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It's good that you are admitting your addiction! LOL

M.K.

Ah, admitting one's strengths (oops parapraxis - Freudian slip) weaknesses is the first step to recovery. ~Bernie

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Thanks for the smiles you bring, Bernie!

C.K.

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You are incurable Bernie. Perhaps a lobotomy…

B.W.

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*Native plants are those that have interacted with the animals around them, for a long period of time. Most insects that eat plants can develop and reproduce only on the plants with which they share an evolutionary history.